There is a possibility. The house may be rebuilt..possibly with some stronger material. I'm not saying much more now. Lets close this chapter and move on shall we?

Fragile

Life, events and achievements are altogether too fragile. These past three months have built up a house of cards in my head. A house of cards whose terrace reached the clouds. And what a view it was! But the clouds obscured the real view. They made me see only the airplanes flying at my level..but blocked out the termites settled in the foundations. Termites that were invariably there because the foundation was fragile..always built on mediocrity and nothing more. And before I knew it, the house of cards fell down..some of the cards lingered in a kind of suspended reality, leering and me before they are collapsed in a pile over the mediocre foundations. A house built with hard work, sincerity and grit..but the foundations were too mediocre to hold it up. They were always too mediocre. And I lie there in the foundations, dazed with the termites jeering at me and wonder about the house of cards with weak foundations..wonder if it was even worth the effort. I mean, who even bothers to put in that kind of labor for something so transient with weak foundations on top of it!

But the house of cards was precisely that. It was built with skill and determination to prove to the world and to myself that it could be built..no matter how futile the endeavor. In a way, the house of cards is (was) the foundation for another house. But now it has collapsed..and I am left wondering what will happen, whether any house cards or brick can be built on foundations that are essentially mediocre.

Aiyyo.....aiyyo... and..... aiyyo. More decisions of life changing sort happening. Confusion also happening. I thought I was done with these decisions!

Will go drown myself in some music..the only real and constant thing.

Btw, this is my 100th post! Man I had no idea I could write so much!!